STEALING - stories of an EX-theif

When I was 11, I felt the need to concentrate on my physical appearance to help me enhance my confidence. My adolescent life was fast, full of mischief, experimenting, and testing my limits. And physical appearance was key in middle school - especially at Pacific Heights. In 6th grade after our annual talent show rehearsal one day I felt low, ugly, and in need of some self fulfillment. Maybe it was because I wasn't getting any attention from the boy I liked. Or maybe my dance moves weren't up to par compared to the other girls. Or maybe I didn't feel pretty enough. Whatever it was, I needed a fix.

...I got off the 20J bus, walked to Payless Drug Store with a couple of my friends and jetted strait to the makeup section. Ma didn't want me to wear makeup. So I didn't have any. I wanted it. And there was something in my gut that was telling me that I needed to have it. I had $10 in my pocket - enough to buy it. BUT I grabbed a deep brown lip liner, like the one I saw Brandy wearing on CMC, tore the plastic off it, and stuck the liner into my backpack. To my surprise, I got caught.

If my grandpa didn't pick me up I would have went to Juvenile Hall. But it wouldn't be the beginning of my troubles with authorities. I stole lip liner. I learned my lesson. I was hard on myself for years. But I still stole other things in life - men, money, hearts, and clothes. Men was the worse. Money was small. Hearts kicked me in the ass. And clothes added to the garbage I'd accumulated in life.

So I don't steal anymore. My heart's finished with stealing. Karma visited me full force. And I'm certain that stealing is something I could do without. What I need is what I have and what I will find the right way. The rest is just baggage.